Our Path to Peace

My ten-year-old and I participated in the Walk for Peace in Raleigh, North Carolina and attended the outdoor peace rally at the state capitol. It was cold and our hands were numb, even with gloves, but our hearts were warm and full of gratitude. To see so many people walking and then huddling together- not out of fear or anger, but of a desire to keep each other warm and to hear messages of hope - was a profound experience. 

The Venerable Bhikkhu Pannakara reminded us that our reality reflects what is inside each of us. Each breath, each step, each moment, is an opportunity to practice mindfulness - to let go of the thoughts that flood our mind and go into the heart space. To feel the life force energy flowing through us, and out to each other. Each day can be our peaceful day. 

When the venerable monks chanted their blessings at the end, we could feel the vibration of their voices reverberating in our chests as a wave of peace washed over us. We left knowing that peace is possible. But it starts within each of us. 

I’ve been practicing that ever since.

A few evenings later, the boys’ dad became upset when our ten-year-old refused didn’t to move the couch back. I took a couple of breaths and said quietly, “I’m going to disengage” and walked back to my bedroom. The tension deflated almost immediately.

A couple of nights after that, the boys got into a fight over a game. They each wanted to make the rules. They were both screaming.

I focused on my breath. In. Out. I focused on my heart space. As I did, I felt my nervous system begin to settle - deactivating in real time.

I walked back to the bedroom and extended my arm. The boys followed. We all sat together on my bed. They continued to argue, and their dad came in to help - but he was upset too. Instead of frustration, I felt compassion. It wasn’t so long ago that I would have been exactly where he was.

“I’ve got it,” I told him gently, “You can go.”

I kept breathing. In. Out. Heart space.

He left. Both boys then put their heads in my lap. I cradled them there, one in each hand, and just kept breathing. Slowly, their breathing began to match mine. Their eyes closed.

Then the little one then made a joke. We all laughed. The older one told the younger one he was sorry. The younger one said he loved him. And when his brother said, “I love you too,” I knew it was over.

I don’t know what the future holds. And that’s okay. Because with each breath, we have a path to peace.